All my vinyl is chucked! Help?

I am never movng house again this if officially hell. We have skip it is full. We have a house it is full of flotsam and jetsum and we have now lost sight of the carpet.  Boxes and boxes of stuff and no end in sight. What am I to do with my  albums? I don’t have a record player anymore although half of them are signed they are also too scratched to play even if I did have a record player. Decide after a couple of glasses of wine to chuck them out.

Wake up at 6 am, put on my dressing gown and slippers and go shuffling out in the dark and cold to retrieve  my albums from  the skip.  What was I thinking of? These are my heritage. I must be losing my mind. My signed Bryan Ferry EP is missing. Sobbing  I dry off my Bad Company bootleg and Sister Sledge 12”. By the way that picture above  is of Bad Company – I didn’t even know they looked like that. Albums just had art on the covers and now I know why –  to be honest I’ve gone off them a bit.

How I need a rampage and a party and a record player to play all these songs –  that would cheer me up as a lug another bin liner full of tiny old clothes I will never fit into the car for Cancer Research shop. Lots of records, no clothes and utter mayhem all around. Please may this soon be over. I need a pub and I need it now.


Writer & broadcaster.

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