Screeched the car to a halt at the side of the road today. Flora, one of my dogs flew past my ear from the backseat the other one, Sammy the half wit lab, slid onto the floor behind the drivers seat with a thud. But I had no choice. I had to do an emergency stop when I saw these coos.
Look! Skin and bone and a depressed looking fizzog.

Got home, downloaded the photograph and sent it to my pal Shaun – a farmer in Dingwall. 35 seconds after I had uploaded it I phoned him in a state of panic. Something must be done ! I shreiked.There is deep cruelty in the Scottish countryside.
OK I will have a look he said. 30 seconds later the phone went.
‘They’re supposed to be

like that’.
Really?
‘Aye. Really. They are Jersey dairy cows and that’s how they look’.
Just thought I’d show you in a bid to save your brake pads, camera memory stick and most importantly dogs noses. Half dog, half womble Flora is still not speaking to me as the memory, along with the noseprint on the windscreen, lingers long. It would be fair and accurate to say her nose is out of joint. Literally.