St. Andrews home of golf and chocolate frenzy.


In the cinema the other night saw a big advert for VisitScotland so looking at my spotty white face call my friend and ask her if she fancies escaping for a couple of days. It’s Easter hols and Dave and Louis are away. My friend has breast cancer and this is the week she should feel OK as she is in the middle of her chemotherapy treatments plus she is going a bit mad being stuck indoors all the time so happily she doesn’t hesitate.

We don’t want to go too far so off we go just one hour north of the central belt to St Andrews. Every time I go up to St Andrews I remember what a lovely town it is with its huge clean beach and great sweep of white sand for endless walks and fun for kids if the weather is good enough for sandcastles and paddling. If not, thermal underwear and a cosy hat are all that’s required so we head off into the wind for a bracing walk before the food and drink ensue.

We are staying at St Andrews’ Bay Hotel, a few miles out of town with the most fabulous views imaginable. You sit perched on the edge of the two golf courses and the hotel looks back over the sea to St Andrews and beyond. The hotel itself was built and designed by an American company which explains the generous proportions of the rooms, corridors and facilities. Although this is high season, it felt ultimately luxurious and spacious as we swanned about feeling very Bette Davis descending down staircases and reclining on gigantic comfy sofas sipping large gins. We have a quiet night in preparation for our hard day ahead

The hard day starts with a Swedish massage followed by a facial. It’s a hard life. Phone Dave – he and Louis are having Boys Own adventure type fun and God love them for it, I think, as I stretch my massaged leg out for inspection.

Being foodies we try the hotel’s new fine dining restaurant Esperante. We are seated on a romantic little balcony so we can oversee everything going on. Great gossiping and giggling. The food is fabulous. We start with cauliflower pannacotta – no have no idea what it is but by God will never forget it for all the right reasons! On to our pud a chocolate pudding which spills out melted chocolate from the inside. We are so excited we insisted in giving the chef our compliments personally. The poor guy, Scott Dougall, comes out and is duly showered by endless words of praise and yums and oohs and ahhs. If this man doesn’t have a Michelin star within two years will eat my hat – and that’s not an appetising thought I can assure you. Eventually when we are finished – first in, last out – we are happy, excited and eager to phone all our friends to tell them about our meal but we think better of it and off we go to bed as by now it is 1am
Wake Dave up with a phone call – telling him I am taking him here for his birthday. He had a sausage and bean camp fire tea last night. As inhumanely describe what I had in great depth, it is no surprise he eventually puts the phone down on me. More girl stuff to be done so we go off to explore the shops. We are on red alert to spot any members of the Royal Family and of course, having clocked Clint Eastwood on the golf course up here a few years ago, we keep our make-up on at all times because you just never know. Reluctantly we head back home after a large coffee and talk about the food we ate all the way back
Through to Glasgow for a couple of meeting s sporting a boil on my chin. Why is it when need to go somewhere and look vaguely reasonable the middle-aged hormones play a trick on me? Meet up with pal Barbara for lunch in Antipasti in Byres Road. order a Caesar salad with swordfish. Good God, it is the size on an elephant. So much for my low cal option – I eat the lot
Dynamite calls to remind me she has postman Pat staying with her. A few years ago Dynamite was in the stage version of Postman Pat and she played both Mrs Goggins, Postmistress, and Granny Dryden and the cast have all stayed in touch. Although Postman Pat has a real name, Di still calls him Pat! He is up performing in Boogie Nights at The Playhouse with David Essex so Di is going along then partying afterwards and asks if I fancy it. With my full belly and chin boil I decide against it – I don’t want to put her off her tea SaturdayThe weekend is here and Dave and Louis are home. They had a great time being outdoors and healthy whilst I had a great time being inside and foodie. Call from Dynamite asking for number of detox place we went to last week as both she and Postman Pat are in need. I ask her if David Essex is going too – the answer is a no so I put away my Lamplight single wanted him to sign.

Thank goodness Easter eggs time is coming to an end. I’ve eaten my weight in chocolate. With tummy hanging over the top of trousers I sign off. I’m off for a jog – honest.


Writer & broadcaster.

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