Blush? You could fry an egg on it.

I have one of these attached to me.

So my pal casually says a mutual friend has thrown her husband out because of his continuous frotting. I thought firstly she meant frothing – at the mouth – you know the sort of thins, slavering, droopy bottom lip sort of deal. Then she told me frotting was more like rubbing against someone in a bar or something – oh nasty I said and decided to write about it in my column.

Only once I had sent my copy did I find out via a friend who spat her soup out when I said I had been talking about frotting in the press that it was something altogether more along the line of being a sexual deviant. The urban dictionary spelt it out. Not that you want it spelt out to be honest. It will put youryou’re your tea. Suffice to say it does involve genitals and general friction – enough.

 

I only realised recently that there are no dogs involved in dogging – not 2 legged ones anyway – so it seems I live in my own bubble of ignorance. And happy I am with it too.

Thank you and good bye