Nothing like wrapping your gums round some frankly spectacular chocolate.
I buy it to ignore.
I hide it high in my cupboard.
But I know it’s there.
I sit in my studio, I talk nonsense, get paid, leave the studio but still in the back of my brain is a niggling little ‘there is chocolate within easy reach, Alison and you know you want it’
After chewing on a few dry bits of old Ryvita I relent. I always do.
One small bite? Nope. I just horse the lot.
Latest temptation was a small but perfectly formed selection of mini chocolate eggs I received from Hotel Chocolat. Now when I say mini I mean about quail’s eggs size. Each one was different.
Determined not to just gorge I made myself a lovely hot cup of Rooibos tea – incidentally how do you pronounce that? Is it Redbush? – I tried that but every time I thought about it my screwed up brain launched into the first three lines of Nutbush(Redbush) City Limits…Church House, Hen house…see what I mean…so I have started calling it Rooibos which maybe pretentious. If it is. Tough. It’s better than being thrown out of the house for trying to sound like Tina Turner at 8am on a Monday morning. Oops sorry digressing again.
So cup of tea in hand I flipped open this delightful mini egg feast and – pop – selected one at random, it sat on my tongue for 1 -2 seconds before I gurumphed it down and boy what a delight it was.
As I lay back enjoying the whole chocolate is a substitute for sex feeling Teenwolf my enthusiastic eating offspring came loping in. ‘Hi Mum WOW they look good’ he blurted as his arm lunged towards the box.
‘Stop’ I commanded from my prone position ‘you can have one but only if you describe it for me’ Accustomed as he is to many strange requests he didn’t bat an eyelid, instead he nodded sagely, selected one and popped it in his mouth.
These are his words not mine
The Strawberry one ‘very delightful, seemingly sweeps across the tongue blissfully’
‘Are you taking the mickey?’
‘Maybe’ he said ‘but it was good.’
‘Ok have another’
The Whisky one was next. ‘Not my cup of tea, however the strong whisky taste comes through all guns blazing, it certainly zaps the senses’. Relieved he hadn’t developed an instant love of whisky he eyed up the remaining eggs. Living with a writer has rubbed off on him, I suspected as he then said – The Chocolate Brownie one. ‘It tastes as it sounds, creamy, decadent, full of loveliness. A childhood favourite place in a chocolate shell, could life be any better?’
By now I was laughing so much I must have burned off loads of calories so after locking him out of the room I ate the rest myself. They were a delight.
No here’s the good but, if you like the idea of these sumptuous oval eggy delights then I have a box to give away! I do. Just answer this question. What is it about chocolate and women? Nah that’s a bit tricky….OK how about an anagram.
Rearrange these letters to find something delicious and seasonal:
The coolest sage grace
Send your answer to email@example.com and I’ll announce the winner next Monday. Good Luck!
Yum. Oh and just to drive your famiy as mad as I do mine, here’s Tina doing what she does best. Singing about tea with pizzazz!