Sculpture depicts man peeing on the golf course – nice

I love a piece of public art. I do, I love that strange giant horse that sits at the side of the M8, the Anthony Gormley sculptures in The Water of Leith and scattered over Edinburgh.  But I did burst out laughing when I saw this one. And I don’t think I need to tell you why, one quick look will confirm that it looks like a geezer well…….

Ben Sayers caught short on the course it seems

having a pee. It does. Standing at the side of North Berwick golf course it will raise a smile.

I can’t tell you the number of times I have walked, driven, run quickly in the opposite direction when I’ve clocked a bloke standing at the side of the motorway, road, behind a parked car, leaning his head against a wall  having had a few too many sherberts just letting it all hang out – literally – and piddling.

Us girls on the other hand have a lot less freedom. Though I do remember being on the M8 once with Dynamite who announced she was desperate for a pee , just as we slid to a halt in a very long traffic jam. Time passed, the  jokes about water and the collective  whistling which for some reason makes your need worse had stopped and Dyna doubled up and squirming.

‘Look’ I said ‘we’ve been in this queue for 20 minutes and haven’t moved at all just nip out, and squat over there on that embankment  beside the car, no-one will see you’.

Interesting technique

As the only other option was an empty bottle she had little choice and leaping out  as she settled down into probably the most satifying piddle in the world the cars moved. They peeped at me and waved their fists I had to move along. I shouted at Di out the window but she had now choice it was a Magnus Magnusson moment – ‘I’ve started so I’ll finish’ 

So a long line of cars, lorries, vans and buses  slowly passed the squatting red faced Dynamite…by the time she had finished we were another 50 yards along the road so the poor soul had to run past all the cars that had passed her who tooted their horns and waved. 

So if you ever see a statue of  entitled ‘Squatting woman’ you’ll know where the inspiration came from.

Ben Sayers doing what he is better known for - golfing.

Meanwhile Ben Sayers statue in North Berwick will have to keep you amused. Next time you’re there give him a wave – though remember he won’t wave back.